…or maybe it’s just a really big crow. Or some other winged, possibly feathered creature that sounds an awful lot like what I think a pterodactyl probably sounded like…you know, before Jesus killed all the dinosaurs.
Whatever it is, it’s REALLY LOUD (hence the yelly caps) and wakes me up every morning around 5:30.
Day 1: 6:02am – Wow! It’s so amazing to be at the Cape where I get to sleep someplace cool and quiet and wake up to the sound of birds chirping. This sure beats having to listen to those Dominican chain-smokers back home who like to congregate directly beneath my window and scream at each other til 4am. Life is awesome!
Day 2: 5:48am – Up early two days in a row? I am on fire! Thank you, you little chirpy alarm clock, you!
Day 3: 5:57am – Another gorgeous day! The sun is out, the birds are singing merrily…one bird seems to be a little more zealous than the rest, but good for him! Sing on my friend, sing on!
Day 4: [Wakes very abruptly from a delightful dream due to chirping.] 5:32am – Okay…this, this is early. That’s alright. No, it’s good. Getting up at the ass crack of dawn is a good thing. A nice early start to the day. Love that. Gonna get lots more done today cause I’m up so early and stuff. Yeah…
Day 5: [Thunderstorm the night before and it’s still pouring buckets outside.] 8:30am – Boy, do I feel well-rested! I’m gonna get right out of this bed and be productive! Life is awesome! Yay!
Day 6: 5:36am – Aaaaaaand we’re back to this again.
Day 7: 5:42am – Those are NOT normal bird sounds.
Day 8: 5:47am – Okay, seriously? What the hell is that? It sounds like someone is slaughtering a pig out there. Can birds even make that sound?
Day 9: 5:37am – Sweet creepin’ Jesus enough with the birds already! Those little fuckers are louder than the Mexicans parading down Broadway on the Feast of Our Lady of Guadalupe. And the birds don’t have the benefit of an amplified karaoke machine blaring out of the back of a low-rider 1987 Toyota pick-up… [I am grudgingly impressed.]
Day 10: 5:40am – I now know why guns were invented.
Day 11: 5:39am – Have you ever heard an old drunk lady singing Tammy Wynette’s ‘Stand By Your Man’ a half step flat at the top of her voice in Spanish at 3am? Cause I have. I live directly above a Mexican restaurant that does karaoke a couple of nights a week. It’s…an experience. Anyway, I’m starting to think I prefer that to the ungodly sounds coming out of this bird’s throat. Do bird’s have throats? Cause if they do, I want to strangle this one.
Day 12: 5:14am – SQUAWK! SQUAWK! GET YOUR ASS OUT OF BED! IT’S NOT LIKE YOU HAVE TO SING AN OPERA IN 15 HOURS OR ANYTHING! SQUAWK! Oh you have got to be kidding me. [I actually launch myself out of bed to try to see what the hell this alleged ‘bird’ looks like. All I can see is a large, dark shadow. Naturally, I assume it’s a dinosaur.]
I’ve got to blog about this…